Screaming Internet Connection Kangaroo !

SICK (noun). An acronym relating to an individual who is distressed by slow or intermittent broadband connection(s), internet service providers and the telephone call centres which allegedly are there to resolve such issues. Such victims are left hopping mad like a boxing kangaroo, screaming their heads off at invisible and anonymous persecutors.

Yes, Marcus Canon’s legendary patience and tolerance (or is that volubility and Celtic aggression?) has finally run out. I am indeed SICK. I finally get around to my blog and writing after a hiatus of months and the damned internet starts crashing.

Being an engineer, I thoroughly checked out my PC, phone lines and router only to find nothing wrong. All of them crash whenever it is windy and where I live that happens a lot. I traced the fault to the external phone line, which is not my responsibility.

Amazingly, I am having to write this in a brief lull between low pressure systems. Strangely at the moment these low pressures are causing simultaneous high pressures…in my fragile and tattered mind, as the internet keeps crashing!

A week after the fault began and six calls to my internet provider (between gusts) and I am still waiting for them to agree that the outside line is where the fault lies. That’s a total of almost twelve hours gone from my life.

Aaaaaarrrrrrghhhhhhh! I’m not a fan of expressing screams like that, but the situation calls for it.

Why do these little Hitlers manage to drive us insane? I imagine mental health institutions worldwide are full of sad, SICK people, rocking gently back and forth to the sound of crap music, which they hear in their heads. They are still on hold in their own poor deranged minds, knowing that their delusory call is important to those on the other end of that ethereal phone line.

It is horrific and has to stop, brothers and sisters. Together we can eradicate SICKness from the Earth! Join me in protest against call centres of any kind, but especially those full of supercilious geeks who have fun making you do all manner of ridiculous tests in order to try to avoid their company’s responsibilities.

Okay, that off my chest, I just made up the acronym. It doesn’t really exist, but it should.

Hurray! I’ve got the post finished. Better go ‘cos I can see the trees twitching in the breeze outside! Goodbye for now.

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About marcuscanon

I'm a bit eccentric, but honest and open. I live in a beautiful part of the world with my daughter, cat, guineapigs and a motorbike called Bella. I'm a mechanical engineer by profession, but now write books, sci-fi with my own personal (slightly deranged) twist. My passions are endless, like my curiosity. I love music, art, people, nature, pebbles...you get the picture. I detest intolerance.
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